I was never passive in terms of my romantic interests. I don't think I'll ever learn how to just sit and wait for the guy to do something because I don't believe in traditional sex roles. I don't believe the guy has to pursue the girl. I don't believe he has to open doors for her and carry her fucking purse. I don't believe guys should pay for every fucking meal on a date and I don't believe that if sex happens on a first date, the girl is a slut.
FUCK EVERYONE WHO BELIEVES THAT SHIT. AND FUCK EVERYONE WHO FUCKING PERPETUATES IT.
People can be so fucking stupid, I sometimes want to take the fucking elevator to the roofdeck and jump to my fucking death. But that would only mean the stupidity won, so I'm not doing it.
I won't apologize for anything. I won't apologize for supposedly thinking too much, because I have a working brain and I happen to use it more than some people do theirs. Don't fucking tell me not to think because I've always thought about things too much and I'm not going to apologize for that because that has made me into a more conscientious person. I'm not going to apologize for how I acted, because that was my honest reaction to what was going on. I was myself; I didn't pretend to be someone or something else. I'm not sorry about the conversation we had. I'm not sorry I enjoyed your hugs and wanted more of them. I was honest about what I felt, so I think it's only fair to expect you to be honest too.
Ah, expectations. Perhaps I shouldn't have expected anything in the first place. But you said I was your good friend and I fucking took that seriously because "good friend" is not a title I simply bestow upon anyone. And I think it's only natural for good friends to expect good things from each other.
Well, I guess we could say I know better now. I'm no good friend of yours. I'm not even a friend.
Oh well. Karma chameleon.
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